| I’m learning brain cells come and go, but fat cells live forever. |
| There’s always going to be danger in the comfort zone, because regardless of the weather, every path is going to have a few puddles. Life isn’t a dry run. |
If you choose to treat your kids like dogs, don’t be surprised when they end up pissing on you leg and spending their life in the pen.
| When life gives you lemons, cut em in half and squirt them in your buddies eyes and watch as they roll around like a harpooned hippo in a banana tree. |
| To the Ones who watch movies alone on Friday night—the ones that eat a meal by themselves– the ones that are avoided on a bus–the ones who sleep alone to wake to emptiness–to the ones who shop with no one to buy for–the ones who truly understand left field–the ones who don’t follow the crowd–today I am thinking of you. |
