| I was in line today behind a guy that was living proof evolution can go in reverse. If you’re gonna be stupid you’d better be tough. He wasn’t. |
| Too many folks are busy being alive but not living. We’re in the land of the dead heading for life not In the land of the life heading for death. |
| Stop looking at God and crying “God, look how big my problem is”, rather look at your problem, then laugh and say “Problem, look how big my God is”. |
| There are two people in a marriage. One’s always right; the other’s always the husband. |
| Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day unless you wanna lure in crap eating dogs. |
