| When you’re hit by a stranger it makes you mad. When you are hit by a loved one, not that hurts worse. Many times the worst hits are never punched. |
| When someone you love hurts you, and you can’t understand why, remember: in pain comes life’s lessons, just speak softly because you can’t undo a said word. |
| If a man with multiple personalities kills himself, would that be murder or suicide? |
| The maximum effective range of an excuse is 0.0 inches. Remember the only difference in a rut and a grave is the depth, so don’t dig your own. |
| If a cat lands feet first, and butter toast always falls butter side down, what happens when you glue buttered toast to a cat’s back and toss them off a roof? |
