| You should treat your friends like family, and your family like friends, because that’s how high you step, like a rooster in deep mud with tube socks on. |
| I was in line today behind a guy that was living proof evolution can go in reverse. If you’re gonna be stupid you’d better be tough. He wasn’t. |
Everything my brother learned in life I decided he learned from Gilligan’s Island
Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.
| Last thing I learned today is just because you’re feeling all roistered up, not everyone is going to appreciate your “cocka doodle do”. |
