| When you grow up you realize the real world doesn’t care what you did or who you were in high school anymore. |
If you choose to treat your kids like dogs, don’t be surprised when they end up pissing on you leg and spending their life in the pen.
| That awkward moment when you bark back at a dog to show him who the real boss is. |
I think the only reason my mother in law wasn’t with Noah on the ark, is they couldn’t find another monster I mean animal that looked like her.
A surefire way not to be able to enjoy the roses is to continue to water and feed your weeds
