| Only two people have given their life for you, Jesus and the American Soldier. Thank one and pray to the other. |
Why doesn’t glue ever stick to the inside of the bottle?
You give some women heaven and earth and they still want a tobacco field in hell
| Some days I feel like the redneck Confucius. Nobody really understands me, but I can put a sheet on in the mirror, “hmm wuusaaa”, and feel wise. |
The mosquito that bit him last night is hungover this morning.
