| When I got married it was to Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was always. |
| When you see one roach, there’s always fifty more you can’t see. So keep the lights on when dealing with those lower than snake snot, it tends to blind them. |
| I wonder if PETA considers scrambled eggs chicken abuse or do they think it’s possible to harass a mosquito. |
The only way you can keep you feet on the ground and your hand to the plow is to carry some weight on your shoulders
| You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends, but you can’t wipe your friends on your seat, so make sure when you’re picking, be smart. |
