30th ANNUAL LIZARD LICK FESTIVAL
I’m learning brain cells come and go, but fat cells live forever.
| God grant me serenity, patience & Rachel Ray as my wife’s new best friend cause if you can smell what’s cooking at the house, Amy burned dinner again. |
| When the boogey man goes to sleep every night he looks under the bed for Bobby Brantley. |
| Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day unless you wanna lure in crap eating dogs. |
| Guys, when you’re scared to death, look to the one that gave life, then look to the one he put by your side. It cost us a rib, a small price to pay. |