| I once had a college essay on what’s courage and got an A when I turned in a blank paper with my name on top. That’s slicker than eel snot. |
| When Shakespeare said the pen is mightier than the sword that’s only because he hadn’t been stabbed yet. Days later, he retracted that statement. |
Saw a man so little he had to run around twice just to make a circle. Only had one stripe on his pajamas. Could ride a seedtick bareback.
When you think you are someone of importance go and try and boss your neighbors dog around
Expecting life to reward you because you try hard is like expecting a bull not to charge at you cause you don’t eat steaks.
