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Big Lizard Wisdom

You’d rather be super glued to a bar of soap on the shower floor of a men’s prison than to cross Amy.  She’s tougher than a 3 dollar pig steak.

Favorite Verses

Been watching Hatfields & Mccoy’s awesome show. It’s just a shame that feud started over a de-friending on Facebook and some derogatory tweets.

Dirt Word

Be careful never to corner anything meaner than you.


You give some women heave and earth and they still wanna tobacco field in hell.


Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Call them steps outside and stairs inside? Why does fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?