I’m learning brain cells come and go, but fat cells live forever.
| Only thing to fear is fear itself was not said by a man married to a redhead who would put a rattlesnake in your pocket and then ask for a light. |
The greatest waste of time is living through someone else’s eyes
| God grant me serenity, patience & Rachel Ray as my wife’s new best friend cause if you can smell what’s cooking at the house, Amy burned dinner again. |
| We traded cigarette billboards on interstates for topless bar ads. Guess those folks figure there’s no difference in dancing with the devil and sleeping with him. |